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Mathew Horne is not, he is keen to point out, blind in one eye. He is not colour-blind; he doesn't front a band called Perestroika; he has never had his watch stolen by a seagull, and he has never suffered a snake bite to his leg. Oh, and he has never had sex with the manager of Charlton Athletic in the toilets at hip London hang-out Shoreditch House. Horne can't account for why all these ...
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